What Really Happened in Vegas?

Six years ago, I moved to New York City and went about making new friends. As I would get to know people and start swapping stories as new friends do, I realized I would get the same reaction over and over. Every time I’d mention that I had lived in Las Vegas, or had been married (and divorced) twice, and sold guns, people never seemed to be sure if I was kidding. There would be this moment of silence while they were waiting (maybe hoping) for me to jokingly punch their arm and say, “just kidding!” I just thought they were just waiting for a punch line, and of course, I usually had one. Then we’d laugh and they’d suggest I write a book.

I thought about writing a book, but I didn’t think I would ever get around to it, let alone performing a show about my personal experiences, although I do enjoy reading and seeing others. Then one night I happened to go see The C Word, written and performed by actor/comedian Pamela Murphy and directed by Rebecca Drysdale at Upright Citizens Brigade (UCB). It was a well-written and hilarious look at Pamela’s experience with breast cancer, and not once did she ask the audience to feel sorry for her. She found a brilliant way to do a one-woman show without the bitterness, heavy drama, or the my-life-is-so-bad-let’s-all-sit-on-the-pity-pot-together kind of plot. She didn’t have to constantly break the fourth wall and explain or apologize for herself, and she didn’t even have to go in chronological order. It was great, and not only did it still make sense, it was real and really funny. She was my new hero, and I wanted to write a show like this, and I wanted to work with her director, Rebecca Drysdale.

As such, it was extremely important for me to write a truthful story without the vitriol that one might expect from a two-time divorcee with a crazy past.

As luck would have it, Rebecca was offering an eight-week solo show class, so I signed up. This class was the most fun I had ever had writing about anything, personal or otherwise, minus one or two juicy entries in my personal journal (which you will never read). When the class ended and I had enough material to move forward, I called director Trish Vignola, whom I had worked with previously and admired. Like Rebecca, Trish had a strong Second City and UCB background and is a comedy ninja. After discussing my solo-show premise with her and tossing ideas around, I knew that she was the perfect director for me. Not only was she on the same page in regard to the perspective in which I wanted to tell my story, but also I couldn’t ask for a more committed and hard-working collaborator.

For me, humor is a way of life—a good laugh always seems to get me through the day, no matter how tough things may get. As such, it was extremely important for me to write a truthful story without the vitriol that one might expect from a two-time divorcee with a crazy past. The truth is, I’m really not angry or bitter, and I can honestly say I could never be that lonely old woman with ten cats. I’m allergic to cats. I may not be able to explain all of life’s unexpected turns, but I do know that I can always find the funny in it. Like our own one-person show, life is what we make it.

Lady Luck is a Whore is a series of character sketches; I play over twelve different people, including myself. My parents are characters in the show—mom shows the morals they instilled in me, and my dad shows where I get my sense of humor. I love taking on the role of my dad—he says I keep getting divorced because no man measures up to him, and he’s right. I have a tendency to date shorter men.

My ex-husbands were my primary inspiration for this show, and I portray them both in a comedic light, because regardless of what happened, both marriages were an adventure and my life is richer for it. I really loved them both, and through it all, I learned to love and respect myself. Of course, it’s not always easy to realize all of this when it’s happening, but that’s where friends and a therapist come in.

Lady Luck is a Whore will be presented at the Fringe Wilmington Festival, September 27-29, 2012, and at the United Solo Festival on October 17, 2012.